Tuesday, March 30, 2010

How do you remember that?!?

I know people who remember precise details from their childhoods...everything from the exciting memories to the mundane ones. Happy events and those not so happy ones. They remember what they wore on their first day of school. The names of every single family pet ever owned. I am not one of those people.

Oh, I can recall a few happy gems, but it's alarming the number of things that seem to have slipped away forever. Every once in a while I'll hear a sound, see an object, or catch the scent of something that takes me back. Or my mind tries to take me back. I get that warm feeling of nostalgia but I often can't quite put my finger on the exact memory my senses are trying to conjure up. I know instinctively that it's a pleasant memory...but the memory itself is just out of my mind's reach. Grrrrrrr

I do remember what I wore to school on that first day....but only because my mom has it saved in photographic history. I also remember the painfully large splinter Dr. Daughtery had to remove from my foot, but I'm sure that's because my mom still has the offending piece of wood wrapped in gauze so I've seen it regularly over the years. I can recall warmly our family's vacations and trips to our cabin...well at least I remember that we did it often and I remember most of the locations, the details are kinda sketchy.

Don't get me wrong. There are bright lights of recollection that occur and memories that are vivid and real. And I cherish them. Playing baseball, tag, hide & seek, and wading in the creek with my brother and cousins. Car rides, walks, and watching "Lost in Space" with mom and dad. Playing hot/cold and catching crawdads with my Pappaw and eating sliced fresh tomatoes topped with sugar with my Mammaw. Going to Rinks and Shanks and the Ark. School shopping at Kmart. (Yes, Kmart!!!) And watching the "XXXXX million hamburgers sold" sign number increase at the McDonalds on Rt 4 in Hamilton.

I guess, come to think of it, I actually do have a better recollection of my childhood than I thought. More details emerge the longer I think about it. Faces, places, events...and yes, even the name of my Pappaw's dog. Roscoe. Cool!!! And also, I remember quite clearly how incredibly cold the outhouse toilet seat was in the winter time. I think I remember that TOO well. Brrrrrrrrrrr.

Perhaps, there's hope for my memory yet.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

A mother's melting heart...

Hubby and I visited my oldest son and his family this week. My son and his baby daughter were the only ones home when we arrived. I walked in to find my son in a recliner holding--no, more accurately cuddling--my sleeping granddaughter. I couldn't help but smile and my heart filled with love.

There's something about watching your own child become the parent you always knew he or she could be..the kind of parent that you are proud to have produced or in some small part have played a role in. I have watched both my son and my daughter with their children and they both make me so proud. I am so thankful that they are such wonderful, loving, patient parents to my precious grandchildren.

As I watched my son gently and lovingly gazing down at my granddaughter cuddled against his chest, I fondly remembered what he must be feeling at that very moment. That almost overwhelming, heart-melting, wave of indescribable love that fills not only your heart but your entire being, washing through your mind and body making you weak from the strength and power of it. I remember that feeling. I remember it well. As life gets busy and your children grow into adults, you still love them just as much, you still would give your life for each one of them, you still would want to murder anyone who harms them....but those moments of heart-stopping, heart-melting waves of love become fewer and further between. And you miss them.

But, then you see your grown-up child lovingly protecting and holding his own child while she sleeps peacefully...and that feeling comes flooding back making you weak at the knees. It's still there.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Do your turn signals not work???

Honestly, people, is it so difficult to use a turn signal? Or to wait and pull out when you actually have the time and space? Or to not go until it's your turn at the four-way stop? Or...well, I could go on and on. Proper, respectful, responsible driver etiquette has all but disappeared. Poof! If it weren't for the cute little elderly lady who waited well beyond her allotted time at the four-way stop today, I'd be giving up on all driving man(and woman)kind.

What has happened that we can't be bothered with alerting other drivers to our intentions, that we are in such a hurry to get nowhere that we drive irresponsibily with no care to the law, standard driving practices, or common courtesy?

I must admit here, for the sake of integrity, that I do drive a little faster than the limit occasionally. :) That I sometimes get frustrated by the painfully slow driver in front of me and I hate an up-my-butt tailgater as much as the next person...but I still try to be a courteous driver the rest of the time. I use my damn turn signals. I don't cut other drivers off and I don't proceed at the four way stop until it's my turn. Is it too much to ask that other drivers do the same? I think not.

And another thing...I never get into the 10-items-or-less lane with more than 10 items. But don't get me started on that.